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#1: Choosing God’s Best by Dr. Don Raunikarh
No matter how many relationship books I’ve read, this one, hands down is my go to favorite. It’s filled with so much insight, depth and truth when it comes to singleness, dating, and courtship. Choosing Gods Best, gives a godly perspective and gives biblical reasons to support it.
One huge aspect to marriages that last is a solid foundation. In this book it gives helpful direction on how to lay a solid foundation for your home, while you wait on Gods time. This book suggests “the building materials of spiritual maturity, godly character, accountability, emotional health, financial stability, vocational training, parent and household training and commitment” are essential for a solid foundation.” Just like a building a home, in order for it to be done right and not falter, it needs a solid foundation.
#2: Love & Respect by Dr. Emerson Eggerichs
Although this book is directed toward married couples, it is still useful for singles who desire marriage or those engaged to be married. This book gives understand of a couples driving needs. For wives, it is to feel loved. For husbands, it’s to feel respected. I thoroughly appreciate this quote by Dr. Eggerichs where he shares such great insight into marriages.
He says “I have concluded that we don’t have a “marriage crisis” in the Christian community; we have a crisis of faith. The point is that we all have to come to grips with one question: “Do I or do I not believe what Jesus Himself said?” The whole point is that you really can’t do love and respect unless you do it unto Jesus Christ. And if you doubt the reality of Christ, if He is not truly Lord of your life, it wont work.”
#3: The Lady, Her Lover, And Her Lord by TD Jakes
When I read this book years ago, I could feel broken pieces of my past being healed as God spoke to me on what I needed to address in my life in order to have a godly relationship. This book is great for women who want a healthy relationship all around- with themselves, God and their husband. I really love how TD Jake is so personable and vulnerable with the matters of the heart.
One of my favorite insights of his, is when he says for the man “it is far easier for him to give his money, his body, his advice, but when he gives his heart, then he is terrified. What will you do to me if I need you? If I allow myself to open up, what will come out of my heart? He wonders. Wanting is safe, but needing is vulnerable.”
#4: The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman
This is my most talked about book. I use this as a guiding piece in all of my relationships. In this book, Gary Chapman explains how we can effectively express love according to our spouses needs. We all have different love languages and this can be a hard thing to understand, especially if two people have opposite love languages Click To Tweet. This book gives insight into how to love your spouse according to how they feel loved.
#5: Boundaries In Dating by Dr. Henry Cloud & Dr. John Townsend
This book focuses on how to establish healthy boundaries in the dating stage. It gives helpful insight into why boundaries are crucial and needed before you think to say “I do.” I enjoy how authentic and scripture based this book is. It’s hard to find expert dating books that are scripture based and this one is definitely one of them.
I fully appreciate and agree with the statement in the book where it reads “you need to know if you are in a relationship with someone who is going to be defensive when you bring up hurt or conflict or if you are with someone who’s going to be able to listen, learn and respond. If you do not deal with conflict now and the relationship gets serious then you have bought yourself a world of trouble.” He references Proverbs 9:8 and Proverbs 15:12 which are full of wisdom.