Establishing goals to succeed in the new year

Establishing the right goals for you in the new year will take careful consideration. It will require you to get honest with yourself and have some self awareness. Don’t just set a goal that “sounds good” or is “good for you” with no real intention or plan to follow through.  You need to be aware of what it is you need and want.  There has to be a strong desire and a will to do it.

First, think about what is important for you and to you.  Grab some paper and start brainstorming. Prioritize your list with simple and clear details. If you have subscribed to my email list you will get a free download goal setting sheet to help you. I have also included a weekly goal sheet to help you along the way.

weekly goals

Answering what is important for you and to you, will give you a sense of direction. If you can’t answer this then it’s time you start putting yourself out there- meet people and take up a hobby or two.

Know your destination
What do you want to accomplish and why? What are you hoping to achieve? If you do not know this, then you need to explore what it is you could possibly want. Know the facts before you take a big leap into embarking on a big goal.  The more you know the easier and clearer it is to get to your destination. Get specific.

Research your destination so that you have an idea of what you need in order to get there. Think about it this way…when you take a trip somewhere you’ve never been, what do you do? You plan, prepare and have back up plans.

The farther the destination, the bigger the chance of getting lost.  Many obstacles can occur in the process as well: your phone service cuts you off so no gps, your car breaks down along the way or your credit card gets declined while at a gas station. Be safe, not sorry.

Know what steps to take

  • Who is going to help you?
  • What are you needing to help you?
  • When are you going to do it?
  • Where are you going to do it?
  • How are you going to do each goal?

All good questions to ask yourself. Write down, as this could be a really helpful thing in the future when you need to reflect. Put each action step in order with specific instructions. You are better than a one step action. Click To Tweet

Create a 2-5  step process, starting from easiest to hardest. Anything more than 5 steps and you may want to quit entirely.  Anything less and you are not challenging yourself enough.

Let’s prioritize now

  • What do you spend the majority of your time doing?
  •  Where does your money go?

Is it moving you to where you want to be in the future? If it’s not then we need to re-prioritize. Get rid of all the unhealthy things that you are prioritizing.

Sometimes we are aware of this and sometimes we aren’t. One or two of our closest trustworthy friends can see things we can’t always see in ourselves.  We may think our behavior or actions are normal and even sometimes healthy but that’s where we can deceive ourselves.

Here is an example I’m sure many of you can relate to. You spend numerous hours on social media. Your intentions could be good. You say “I just want to help inspire people.”  However the problem comes into play when it consumes.  Many of us are completely unaware when we are in addiction mode.

In my case I am an input junkie who loves researching and discovering new creative ways to better myself and people.  This isn’t helpful though when instead of creating, I’m consuming.  Time is an issue. We can never get it back so how you spend your valuable time is important.

Prioritize what you need to do with an appropriate amount of detail, time and attention.  Block out time to get what you need to do done and clear yourself of distractions which can waste our valuable time.

Monthly Habit Goal Tracker

Track your progress

I’ve included a free pdf that I have made to help you on this journey.  There are so many benefits to tracking your goals. For instance, you can look back and get a very clear picture of what specific goals need tweaking.

When you are on a trip, you can get a feeling for where you are at based on tracking.  Same is true for your goals.  Tracking your goals has many benefits.  You can see what needs more focus and less focus.

It can also build your confidence and faith in yourself in this journey.  You will become more aware of how far you’ve come and how long it took you.   It can especially be helpful as you continue in the future. You will be able to see the growth through reflecting.

Revise when necessary

Whatever isn’t working, tweak it a little. Give it some thought and attention. Don’t just throw out a good goal right away. There is no rule that says you need to do a specific goal just like everyone else. Click To Tweet You are unique and what works for one person, may not work for you. Tweak it in a way, that you know will move you forward in your goal.

You were made to succeed and you will succeed! Just by reading his post alone you have succeeded. Your knowledge, desire and willpower can move you to incredible heights. I believe in you. Let’s do this!

Be blessed & bless others,

❤Coach Dani

 

 

Journaling to benefit your life

Journaling is going to be a life changer for you. I know it has been for me. The more that I have read and researched how amazing it is, I have grown to embrace journaling.

Throughout my post, you will get to see highlights from my bullet journal. I really like this form of journaling for many reasons. It gives you the the flexibility to be creative, make it personal, and use it in a way that is going to benefit your future.

Let’s start by talking about the benefits of journaling…

Journaling reduces stress

Writing allows us to release painful emotions and helps us engage both left and right brain to problem solve.

Makes you smarter
Journaling causes us to grow our vocabulary as we write. We think of new words and meditate on words to use. Journaling has also been shown to increase communication skills. Writing improves your speaking.

Builds Confidence
Journaling allows you to go back to those special times where you were on top of the world, thriving in that positive experience. Click To Tweet You are able to remember and relive it. As a result you gain confidence.

Makes you more mindful
When you write you are actively engaging your thoughts. Writing will allow you to know what sincerely makes you happy and what is really toxic for you. It helps you decipher the good from the bad.

20180111_173645330201909.jpgTracks patterns
Journaling helps us reflect, look back and track our patterns. This can be so helpful and eye opening- as sometimes it’s hard to realize where we fall short when we have so much going on in our busy lives.
Now that we have established some of the amazing benefits of journaling I want to give you some direction in the journaling process.

20180111_18005587244199.jpg

In my last post “Establishing goals to succeed in the new year” I  talked about goal setting. If you signed up for my email list you should have received a free goal setting pdf. This will help you on your journey in journaling.

Some people don’t always know what to write about or where to start. That is why I have questions to get you thinking. If this doesn’t do it for you, then just start by writing what’s on your heart- what you are passionate about, the direction you would like your life to go, or maybe what you are most grateful for.

Take however long you want 5 minutes, 20 minutes- it’s your call. I have been journaling for years and my journaling time always changes. Sometimes I’m super inspired and can write a lot about a particular subject.  Other days I  have heavy things on my heart to write about that is difficult to put in words.  Don’t put a time limit on it- just start writing and see where it takes you. Now get going😉

Be blessed & bless others,

❤Coach Dani

Gifts that keep on giving: gifts that bring a family closer together for more than a day

Any National Lampoon Christmas Vacation fans? My family quotes every line in this movie year around. But I would have to disagree with Uncle Eddie’s opinion- jelly of the month it is far from the gift that keeps on giving. So what are the gifts that keep on giving? 

Experience Minded  Gifts. 

These are gifts that the whole family can participate in weekly, monthly or yearly. Observe and remember what the family enjoys doing. Indoor waterpark (picture to prove how much my dad enjoys it below😉), trampoline park, or ice skating are wonderful ideas. 

You can have each kid open up little gifts that go along with the family deal. It doesn’t have to be expensive. For instance if you buy an indoor waterpark pack- then having kids open up swim toys would be fun. For teenagers, favorite snacks on the drive to the family activity is a great idea. 

An experience could be small and simple.  A gift basket for a game or movie night. Pack in some hot chocolate, blankets and movie or game. 

Fun Lesson Gifts. 

Enroll your child in a sport or activity lesson that teaches them something. Sign them up for swim lessons or cooking or dance classes. I’m a tad partial to giving dance lessons.  Depending on what lessons the family or kids enjoy or could enjoy, this could be a phenomenal gift. If you have a little girl dancer buy her a new tutu, ballet slippers or something related to go along with the lesson. 

Service Oriented Gift.

Offer to babysit a family members kids and give the couple a night out. Buy the couple a gift card to their favorite restaurant or activity.  This can be such a nice break and builds relationships all around.

As the kids babysitter, you can enjoy a fun night out or in. On Christmas, have the kids open gifts that relate to the fun night you have planned. Trust me, the kids will love this. To this day I have an adorable neice who will ask me (with a huge smile on her face) ever time she sees me “Auntie when are you coming to visit me?” It’s the best. 

The time we have with those we love is valuable. Time is something we can never get back. Why not use that time to build on what’s important? Create feelings that bring joy, love and laughter- memories we wont ever forget. Time well spent- this is the gift that keeps on giving.

              Be blessed and bless others, 

                              ❤Coach Dani

    

The power of purposeful giving 

Purposeful giving can be light and fun if our focus is on giving what is available and has thought behind it. Each of us has ways of giving that have potential to change lives. Being practical, creative and personal are great things to think about when you are thinking of ways to give. Your own personality and uniqueness is an asset to the giving  process.

Let’s first start with some good questions to get you thinking in a way that generates practicality, creativity and personal flair. Ask yourself questions such as:

  • What am I able to give?
  • What skills can I offer?
  • What is the need(s) of the recipient?
  • What can I learn to give best to my recipient?
  •  What sources outside of myself do I have to help contribute?
  • What opportunities are there to give?

Remember our end goal is to meet the need and want of our recepient. Once we have answered some of these questions we have a good idea of how we are going to meet the need and want of the individual.Purposeful giving goes beyond a nice gesture. It has the power to build a healthy family, relationship, skill or dream. When we have reached this type of giving, we have reached to the level of blessing.

I remember listening to a speaker long ago. In her talk, she said something like “People say “bless you” but they speak empty blessings.” You see a blessing is something that goes beyond words or a simple gesture. A blessing is a true sense of meeting a want and need that forever changes a person. One of my favorite movies to watch is Les Miserables. This movie has such profound truths and gives such a clear picture of what a life that has been truly blessed and changed, looks like.

Against all odds, the main character Jean Valijean who is an ex-convict is shown kindness from the Bishop. After Jean steels from Bishop he is caught and brought to the Bishop. Bishop gives him what he stole and additional items.

Bishop says to Jean “don’t ever forget it, you’ve promised to become a new man. ” Jean says “promise, why are you doing this?” His response “Jean Valijean, my brother You no longer belong to evil with the silver, I bought your soul.  I’ve randsomed you from fear and hatred. Now I give you back to God.”

This story makes me wonder what life would be like if we acted with this kindness towards every human being.  What if we met people with their deepest needs in a healthy way? If after having blessed someone, we leave it at that. No getting even, no strings attached.

I propose we get creative. Every person has the ability to be creative. I can remember a time where I rallied with a group of girls for a mission. There was a family that was in need of food and money for expenses. Not only did this bless their hearts but it caused a stirring for them to do the same and different blessings. It also drew our relationships closer. Our group started becoming like family and gave us all new ideas on how to reach people with love and kindness.

Wondering what blessings to give? Here are just a few favorite suggestions:

  • Volunteer for a charity
  • Grocery giveaways
  • Filling someone’s gas tank (especially appreciated in winter)
  • Helping introduce and welcome new people to the community
  • Letter to a depressed friend
  • Invest in a friends dream or business
  • Giving gift cards to the homeless
  • Buy and bring a coffee to a tiered and overworked mom

When we are willing to bless others, it softens the heart and gives us an appreciation.  Look for opportunities to bless. Don’t forget to look close. Sometimes those who need it most are some people you wouldn’t expect. They may seem perfect but people hide their sufferings and vulnerabilities.

Have an open heart, a gut that guides you in the right direction and a positive attitude with any and all purposeful giving opportunities.

Be blessed and bless others,

❤Coach Dani

What you need “to do” today to help you succeed

photo by Diana Kinkor photography

An interesting thing happened to me recently.  I took out my “to do” dry erase board. It’s been awhile since I used it- many, many months. I was excited to erase my old “to dos” still listed on the board. Only thing was that they would not erase. Instead they were ingrained in my board.

Most of the to do’s I had listed were written way down on the tale end of my list. It’s a no brainer that these were my things to do that were “less important” and “less fun.” Those things now are no longer relevant and missed opportunities.  I took this mess and used it as a lesson on what to do and not do.

As a result, I have created a step by step process to help you conquer your to do list…

1Grab a sheet of paper. Write down every task you can think of that needs to be done. Don’t worry about order or making it “look pretty” yet- just write. Get specific and condense. Write words that are going to help you remember specially what you need to do for that task.  Condense those words so that it’s not overwhelming and you utilize time and energy to read it before doing it.

2.Put each task in order of importance. This way you push yourself to take care of the pressing needs. Think about what is a pressing need that is going to be a process and take a long time to complete. You need to think ahead so that you can do your work great.  If you know that what you need to do is going to require lots of time and energy- start that task now. Who are the people affected by this task? If it’s a large sum or it affects those closest to you that you interact with daily then chances are it’s important. It needs to be put on the top of your to do list.

3. Put a reasonable deadline on each task.  Sometimes if it is a new task, never been done before this can be tricky. Let’s be realistic and decisive.  How long has it taken someone else to complete? Ask these types of questions to people you know and let this be a guide to helping you put a deadline on your task(s). You can also research to come up with an idea of what a proper amount of time is feasible. Decide on a deadline and stick to it.

4. Do each task. You can personalize this one.  We all have our certain tasks we know we need to do but we hate doing. You can personalize your task to get it done. For instance, if your task is to get up by 6 am to hit the gym- drink a cup of coffee to wake you up or meet up with a friend at the gym as a way to get motivated and follow through.

Stay disciplined  with every step so that you create the habit of doing your “to dos.” I believe in you wholeheartedly. If you get off track pick yourself up, tell yourself over and over “I can do this” and go be incredible.

 

 

 

 

How to be Fearless

Let’s face it, we all have fears. Even the strongest, have fears whether or not they care to admit it. Knowing your fears and the place they hold in your life is insightful. When you understand what makes you afraid, it brings you to a point of decision. You can ask yourself “What do I need in order to move forward into this fearful place?

Often what scares us has no reason. And if they are legit, how much of it really matters? If you’re an insecure or prideful person that thinks  “I don’t need changing” you can stop reading now. This post is reserved for leaders that want to grow.

I can remember my biggest fear coming true years ago. Those select few who know me-like REALLY know me, know that losing those close to my heart in the past has been a scary place. Although it still sort-of falls into that category, it doesn’t have a hold on me like it use to.

My biggest fear came true when I lost my dear Grandpa in 2011. It was heart wrenching. My Grandpa was my security and the man I really learned to love. When battling questions over his death with God I couldn’t help but embrace the fear.

In order to sometimes move forward that’s what we need to do- Embrace the fear. That means getting as real as can be. Through my questioning with God, I wrestled and fought for answers which later on I got. It just wasn’t in the time or way that I wanted them.

When we embrace fear it gives us clarity and peace of mind (on some level).  You take action and reject your feelings. Feelings give us some truth but not the whole truth. As it turns out, your feelings can be deceiving and in some cases put you at a stand still. We acknowledge feelings and then we move on with logic.

Before taking action ask yourself relevant questions. How will this action move me or someone I care about forward in a positive and healthy way? Growth happens when we decide to be scared while taking action to achieve.  We embrace, are enlightened and are able to empower.

I could have decided after my Grandpa passed away to not be vulnerable or get as close to people- that way I wouldn’t have much lose. But that is not living life to the fullest.  That life is shallow and sad. We were made to experience joy-a sense of deep meaning, gratitude and satisfaction. Fear is fuel for a beautiful life that we live with purpose. And when we let it become fuel, it breeds faith. Faith that every day we are closer to an understanding of the beautiful people God created us to be.

 

How modeling made me into a brave young lady

Being brave comes at a price. It requires humility, determination, risk taking, hard work, tenacity and much more. People often like the idea of “being brave” but are sometimes afraid to go through the process of it. It can be painful and take a huge hit on our ego if we “fail.” There is also the scary feeling of possible consequences if we fail.

photo by Nancy May

Let me suggest that once we have figured out what the possible setbacks could be, we look at the possible rewards we could reap from being brave. What do you have to gain from it? Who will be impacted? Let’s make this process personal, practical and profound.

For me the process of being brave has been very personal. I know my limitations but also know that I’m capable of huge success. The more we put ourselves out there, the more we figure out what limitations and strengths we have. When we see progress it makes us confident, happy and moving forward.

My journey in the modeling industry has helped to shape me into a brave young lady. You see, my profile is not the typical model body type. I’m 5’3″ petite and athletic built. I didn’t even think I had much of a shot at anything in the modeling world. Still I decided to give it a go. I needed money and that was the reason I decided to give modeling a green light. I opened myself up to whatever healthy possibilities I could in this field.

photo by Arnold Rossa

I began by answering an ad to a modeling agency. The man interviewing me said that he could see potential within me to do a lot of print work and my look has many uses. It was at this point that I felt hopeful. I started auditioning for different jobs and surprised myself when I got callbacks. Eventually I got pretty good at print modeling. To me it wasn’t as much of a challenge. It was my “safe zone.”

The big challenge came when I decided to answer a runway casting call. Anything but practical to a 5’3″ model with no runway experience, I said “to hell with it, what do I have to lose?” I decided to give it a go just to see what they would say. Little did I know my interviewer was a tall, beautiful, confident pro-football players wife.

I was asked a series of questions that challenged me to the next level. When asked if I had experience in runway modeling I gave the “short girl” excuse. It made practical sense and I had others opinions to back me up. My interviewer, who apparently saw something great within me, asked me to stand up and to do a walk for her. Her response was unforgettable.

photo by Caitlyn Ann

In a very sure of herself sort-of way my interviewer says to me “you need to be doing runway modeling.” I not only got the runway job but I went on in my modeling journey to learn more about who I am and discover what I was truly capable of. I stepped forward into the modeling world and put my best self out there.

photo by Tyler Bloomquist

I went to auditions scared out of my mind but still holding on to a good attitude and confidence in myself. I knew my talents, gifts, and abilities. I knew that whatever the outcome, I was better for taking the steps forward in a new adventure. I ended up getting booked for all but two shows. I met so many people who challenged, inspired and motivated me to be better. I learned more of who I was.

It is because I chose to take steps forward that I learned more of who I want to become. I understand that I am capable of changing this world and inspiring others to be the best version of themselves. Faced with a decision, ask yourself what do you have to lose in stepping forward? Be brave, my beautiful friend. Give a great opportunity a chance and see it change your life.

How to get inspired and stay inspired

How to get inspired and stay inspired

I want you to think about a time in your life when you felt the most alive and inspired. What was it that sparked those feelings? In our lives we go through times where we are more easily inspired and times where it ican be a struggle. We sometimes have to fight to be inspired.

One step towards being inspired is to think about what you absolutely love doing.  Now create an action plan for it.  It’s not always fun to budget for it or rearrange your schedule to make it work.  However, you need to know that you are a priority.  Do everything possible to schedule “you” time in. Be consistent so that it becomes a natural, healthy habit of yours.

Now we take it a step further. Sometimes we get tiered and bored with the things we use to love. This is where you need to kick it up a notch.  For many years I have loved dancing. Then I went through a phase of feeling like I couldn’t learn anything new. I tried many forms of dance and I wasn’t being challenged enough.

 A friend told me about a new dance that had a lot of variety to it and fit a lot of the qualities I was looking for in my life.  At first I was reluctant.  I didn’t want to give it a fair shot because it was a more difficult dance to learn.  It required more patience and  dedication.  I fell in love with everything about the great West Coast Swing dance….the music, slow and fast moves, various ways of  movement and the low cost for lessons and dance. I was sold! It re-ignited a passion in me and I was inspired.  I not only learned a new dance but I learned a lot about myself and how I relate with others.

We can find those feelings of inspiration through exploring new passions.  Be opened minded to things that are not only healthy for you but are also healthy for those you love.  Don’t dismiss an idea just because it’s hard, time consuming or doesn’t fit your style. Give it all you got and give it a good amount of time to feel out if you like it or not.  Determine if it’s creating good results in your life and for those in your life. This could mean joining a running group or a cooking class.  You never know how you are (with a little supportive group help) until you try.

Having good, wholesome, and all around emotionally, spiritually, physically healthy people in your life is a must.  When we are surrounded by people who are doing something with their life it has the potential to inspire and motivate us.  We may not all have the same passions in life and that’s okay.  It’s important that we allow these types of individuals to speak their wisdom on different passions and be willing to learn fresh perspectives.  This can allow for creativity to burst out of us.

 

 

How to be an Incredible Person of Character

Listen.

Often times we like to think we are the smart ones with all the answers.  Therefore, we should be the ones to talk.  However, people of noble character genuinely listen.  They sit back and seek to understand the other persons perspective.  Then they ask great, proactive questions. Why? Because they care. Which leads me to the next point…


Care.

People of character care and they show it in all forms- not just forms that suite them.  They will think outside the box and come up with unique ways to show they care about an individual, cause or people group.  They will execute a plan well thought out that meets the needs and wants of their audience.

Those with Character…


Have Integrity.

Integrity is defined as “being honest and having strong moral principles.”  People of Integrity do what is right.  That means they look beyond their own desires.  They go beyond themselves to look at what is right versus what seems good.  Integrity people are selfless people. They will even sacrifice their own wants and needs to do what is right.

Character people:

Advocate.

They will put themselves in uncomfortable situations in order to speak for the innocent.  They are driven by their compassion for others and are not afraid to take a stand. To advocate for someone shows the heart of a leader with character.

People of Character take Responsibility.

They do not give an excuse for everything.  Instead, they apologize move on to do better and correct their wrongs.  They are reliable and stick to their word.  You don’t have to wonder if they are gonna follow through because they consistently show up and follow through on their commitments.